When NOT to talk
Talking when either of you is tired, frustrated, or angry never works! Decide in advance that you will keep quiet and will get away from your partner when either of you is angry. This does NOT mean that you are “loosing” the argument, agreeing with what your partner is saying, will not get a chance to say your piece, etc. It simply means that there is no point trying to communicate something when the other person is not in a receptive frame of mind. This is so obvious, right? But almost no one takes this approach.
When to talk
At least once a week, all couples should talk about how things are going for them. You can think of this as a weekly “meeting.” The best time for such discussion is typically the weekend, when both of you are well rested.
How to talk
Use the word “We” rather than “I”.
Use words like “request” and “suggestion.”
Copyright © 2018, Rajnish Mago, MD. All rights reserved. May not be reproduced in any form without express written permission.
Disclaimer: The information on this website is intended for general educational purposes only. It is NOT intended as a substitute for medical advice. Patients must ask the clinicians treating them, Dr. Mago or others, for advice specific to their situation.